So over the long
weekend, I decided to totally veg out … catch up on my magazines, bad tv, and
trashy novels. And trust me friends, I did just that. For some reason on
Saturday, I felt the desire to watch Twilight: Breaking Dawn. I don’t know
where this desire came from but as I had christened the weekend “Dani’s Fat
Pants Only Escapade,” I said to myself, “Self, why not?” So as I sat and
watched the movie I came to the realization that I am, without a doubt, the
world’s worst Twilight fan.
The journey to this realization was a long one, with many twists and bends. When the first movie came out, I had
no idea what anyone was talking about. Who the hell was Edward Cullen? Then
someone explained it was a movie about vampires. Now, I was a fan of teen
vampire novels from back in the day. I read the original four Vampire Diaries
books by L.J Smith back in 8th grade and loved them. But, as many of
you might know, loving vampire books back then did not exactly boost your
popularity so I kept my love for them to myself.
So one day, I rented the
Twilight DVD, poured myself a glass of wine, and sat down to enjoy the teenage
angst and vampire awesomeness. Let’s just say I was not impressed. Half way
through the movie, I distinctly remember yelling at the screen, “They glitter,
oh hell no!” I was not a fan. Sure Robert Pattinson was fun to look out but did
that outweigh my overall distaste for the movie, no. So I called a spade a
spade, finished my wine, and chucked the whole experience as a youthful
indiscretion.
Now, let’s fast forward to the
release of New Moon. Everyone around me was excited. We all sat down to watch
the first movie again. I don’t know what happened. I started to enjoy it. I
drank the Kool Aid. I saw New Moon in theaters 3+ times! I had to admit to
myself … I was a Twilight fan. I bought all four books and read them. I have to
admit, I liked them. To this day, I don’t know how it happened. I have not
re-read them multiple times like I have done other series (I read Harry Potter
over again about every two years.) It’s like a reality t.v. show. You hate
everyone in it, but you watch it.
Now, as I said
before, I am not your typical Twilight fan. I am the World’s Worst Fan. And
this is why:
The
new movie is about to come out:
Right before a new film comes out, I get
crazy excited. I watch the teaser trailers, I watch the old movies, and I plan
group trips to the theater. I am a fan!
The
movie is released:
OMG! The movie is about to start. 30
minutes in, I realize I hate these movies. The script is not good, the plot is
not good, and the acting is not good. I always hope that they will get better and
they never do!
The
movie is released on DVD:
YAY! I must run to the store and buy it!
I have movie amnesia. I’m so excited to see it again.
I
watch it at home:
Dear God, how could I have forgotten! I have
completely blocked out that I don’t think these movies are good!
I am sure I am not
the only one who feels this way about this series. If anyone knows why we
suffer such epic movie amnesia, please feel free to let me know!
PS- Breaking Dawn
will be out November 16th! So excited … (I think I have a problem)
No comments:
Post a Comment